We have been able to achieve all the wonderful dreams our mothers never dreamt of. We have been able to create an equitable society where we also have the opportunity to climb the corporate ladder and we collect the same pay as men.
We have been able to persuade men to do house chores with us. We are demanding equal rights and responsibilities from society. We have been able to normalise the things our ancestors made abominable:
Men speak, we challenge.
Men act, we react.
Today we say, what a man can do a woman can do better.
Yet, we still can’t ask our crushes on date.
Since when did we stop going for what we want?
Since when did we become the type of women who wait for what we want to chase or come to us.
When a man crushes on a woman he approaches her and makes his feelings known but a woman rarely would.
A lot of woman are hesitant when it comes to letting men know how they feel about them or even asking them on a date. My problem is, why have we not being able to normalise this?
We are afraid we would be called names or be stigmatised. But when we start asking men on dates it will eventually become normal as well.
The day i told my friends I would propose marriage to my boyfriend I was looked at with very criticized eyes.
“How can you force a man to marry you?”, they asked.
Is that force?!
“What if he is not ready to marry you and rejects your proposal?”
Is this news?!
A lot of women reject proposals with the justification that they are not ready, so when he rejects my proposal with the same justification, that’s fine.
WHY YOU SHOULD ASK A GUY ON A DATE
1. SOME MEN ARE AFRAID TO MAKE THE MOVE
I once asked a friend how he would feel if a girl asked him on date. I guess that was the happiest question he had ever been asked.
As if he knew how the question was going to end, he answered before I ended. He said that, sometimes he was afraid the girl in question would reject his request so he wouldn’t even make the move in the first place. Just like him, I believe there are several guys who will not act because they fear they go chop bounce.
2. THIS IS ABOUT HOW YOU FEEL TOO
You like him, you have noticed he kind of likes you too. He has said nothing, but his actions tell. Make the move and take him out of his cave; fear.
Fighting for equity shouldn’t always be about positions and responsibilities, your feelings matter. It is equally about how you feel and what you want, girl, go for it!
3. YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT WANT
Women keep rejecting proposals because they are from the ones they do not want or like.
Just like how men know the kind of women they want, likewise women know exactly what they want.
So while waiting for what you want to come to you, why don’t you go for what you want? It makes things easier.
4. WE CAN MAKE IT NORMAL
Our mothers and foremothers will tell you, during their time, you dared not have sex with a man who isn’t married to you.
You dared not spend night with a man even if you are bethroded to him, if he is your boyfriend or if you are about getting married.
It wasn’t normal for a woman to have multiple sex partners and have no shame. It wasn’t normal for a woman to allow herself to be touched in public.
But today it seems normal to do all these.
So, why are we still enjoying the abnormality of asking a guy on a date.
You can make it normal!
5. IT WON’T CHANGE YOUR PERSONA
Asking a guy on a date will not diminish your beauty or reduce your self esteem.
When a guy rejects your request, you won’t lose yourself.
There are some who would lose themselves, therefore if you are such a person, you should avoid it. Therefore, you need to first know yourself.
Women have fought and are still fighting for equity but in terms of their sexual life and feelings, they are still robbed.
Most married women are not able to demand for orgasm because they have been raised to believe that a man is the ultimate when it comes to a couple’s sexual life.
Henceforth when I like you, get prepared because I will take you on a date.
Thanks for reading
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